Is Your Happiness Conditional?

I had a variety of experiences on a recent river cruise that got me thinking about how many non-essential conditions we place on our happiness.

First off, there was the weather. The Netherlands had an unseasonably cold winter this year. This meant that tulips, the viewing of which was our primary interest, began blooming later than usual and we found only hyacinths blooming outdoors on our first trip to the Kukenhof Gardens. Big disappointment!!

Catching our negative thinking in time, we made a conscious attitude adjustment. By the time we found the huge indoor planting of tulips in full bloom, we were ever so happy, as we were when we found some tulips blooming outdoors on our second visit only three days later. The thought that there could have been fuller blooms only skated through the surface of our minds, and for only one small moment :)

On board the cruise ship we were served wonderful gourmet meals every evening. For the first few nights we happened to sit at the same table and developed an enjoyable relationship with our waiter. One night someone else was sitting at our table when we arrived so we took a different table nearby, with a different server.

It would appear that another couple had been sitting at the table we took because the woman was visibly upset when she arrived and found us there. There were no loud scenes, but we could see the server trying to calm her down. How sad that her happiness during that meal depended upon having a certain table and being waited on by a specific server, none of which were conditions under her control.

The trip was like a microcosm of life itself, filled with experiences that required conscious choices of how much we were willing to allow circumstances to disturb our peace of mind. We have so many conditions that have to be met before we can relax, be satisfied, feel happy, enjoy life...., most of them out of our conscious awareness and blinding us to the joy of just being alive.